Your Kid…My Problem???

tracimoran-350x350I used to totally be one of those people that knew how to parent better than EVERYONE,before I had a kid of my own. I was that obnoxious stranger giving people foul looks because their kid was throwing a fit in line at the food store, scowling at random people on the plane because their child was continuously kicking my seat and just passing judgement on matters I had absolutely no business even thinking about.

Now I am the proud mother of an incredibly smart, beautiful, inspiring little princess. The child that throws record breaking fits and shows great potential at being an extremely annoying and forceful seat kicker in the near future. As of now, I officially know everything about being the perfect parent :) Totally kidding! Every day I find myself looking blankly in aimless directions, horribly clueless about the proper way to handle ‘mommy situations’. For example, do I applaud my daughter for sharing with the dogs or try to explain that furry friends aren’t the same as human ones? However, there is one thing that I am totally certain of, no parent should ever be the one that drops their kids at the playground and hopes for the best.

My husband is currently stationed at Fort Richardson in the amazing state of Alaska. I have the ultimate privilege of being with him at this assignment and being able to raise our daughter together when he’s not deployed or temporarily away from home for training. However, it is very tricky and makes me crazy, to have a 1.5 year old indoors all day during the dark, cold, snowy winter. Of course, the military has provided it’s families with an indoor play facility called the Arctic Oasis. It is such an amazing place to run the little ones into a play induced coma, that is until the unattended 9 year old brat is aggressively forcing them self on the toddler slide, trying to take charge of my munchkin and constantly pushing her in a way that I’d like to turn around and return to them(don’t judge me, we’ve all thought about shoving the child that pushes ours).

I just don’t understand the rationale of dumping your child in a public place where children of ALL ages are welcome, while you go to do whatever your little inconsiderate heart desires. I get that we all instill the best manners possible into our children and remind them constantly of proper public practices but they’re still children! BIG children who can be a danger to those smaller than them.

Since discovering this joy of parenthood, it has been a constant moral struggle for me. Because it happens more frequently than any normal person would figure, it’s a constant dilemma of ethics for my husband and I.
-Are you supposed to correct the child’s behavior?
-Do you explain your reasoning?
-Or just rudely grab your child from the situation, potentially hurting the big kids feelings and risking the situation repeating itself?
-Can you raise your voice if the child doesn’t respond and continues to torment your precious baby?

It may seem silly that I’m even pondering about this but I assure you that today I was confronted with the ultimate test of patience. This little rebel kid wouldn’t let me near my child and I didn’t want to have to yell at this poor misguided “youngin” or physically move her out of the way but I needed to rescue my innocent little baby from the situation. This big kid literally kept pushing her, lecturing her with directions that she couldn’t possibly understand and pulling her by her (now stretched out) clothing. Each time I would try to intervene, the big meanie would tell ME, a grown woman, that she had it under control and would try to innocently pat my daughter on the head, as if being a great leader of example. It made me sick to my stomach to encounter a situation where I didn’t know what to do in order to best protect my own whippersnapper. (I googled synonyms for the word child because I hate being too repetitive and I swear to you, whippersnapper was a legitimate suggestion even though its probably the funniest, most ridiculous word I have ever heard.)

For the love of playgrounds and parental sanity, stay with your own kids so someone else doesn’t have to. Your child’s day at the park shouldn’t ruin someone else’s.

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  1. Jewelesa Brooks

    Honey I applaud you !! It would have tool the Wrath of God to get me off of that little brat!!! I don’t card who you are no one messes with my children and if I have to step out of my own mommy box into someone else’s mommy box to get their child to understand I mean business then so be it and with no regrets!

  2. Amy H.

    Whippersnapper is a good word choice. & I would’ve called the kid down maybe a little louder than my normal voice & tried to find his/her parent. I don’t think you’d be being mean to the bullies, & honestly…with the way military spouses can be (no offense to anyone, I’m married to a Marine) with their children, you may be the only person to teach them any guidance. I remember in our first house that was military housing, kids used to run the community streets with no parents at all, for hours. It scared me for them.

  3. Breanna

    I hate that because my son is tall for his age, the big kids play rough with him. Or they’ll yell at him because he won’t get out of the way or he’s following them. I realize he doesn’t look like it, but he’s only 14 months old. He’s a little guy! I usually just try to explain to the other kids that he is younger, and if they don’t correct their behavior I remove my son from the situation. If it ever came down to someone’s hold intentionally hurting him I would have no qualms about raising my voice and making it very clear to them that it is not okay. Unless the child’s parent has stepped in and done this on their own.

  4. April Stumpff

    The way I look at it, if a parent is not going to be around to actually parent their child, then when a situation like this comes up you get the unfortunate honor of parenting that kid. This is especially true when your own child is involved and being put in a precarious situation. And if all else fails, push the kid down.

  5. I don’t discipline other people’s children. That is not my job. Even when my boys were little I wouldn’t do that. It’s not my place. I have really never had to deal with that kind of situation though. Now that my boys are older if there is a situation I usually just go talk to the other parent.

  6. Natalie

    You are so right, this happens all the time. I see it happen even when parents are physically there! Recently, I was at the park with my 3 kids (2 boys and a girl) and another boy was playing with them. He was trying to boss them around and actually spanked my daughter!!! I was so incredibly appalled. I told my kids they weren’t to play with him anymore. When he tried again, my kids said that they couldn’t play with him because of how he acted.. which made him cry. ): But within five minutes he appologized, on his own behalf (his parent had no clue what was going on or where the child was). So we let them play, and all was well after that. But in your story, the parents should not be leaving a 9 year old. In my home state you aren’t even allowed to be alone unless you are 11 or 12? (I forget which exact age). So that is rediculous in my opinion, whether your child is a perfect angel or not.

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