Military life is hard! There’s no if’s and but’s about it. While there are many perks and privileges of this lifestyle that we should be grateful for—military can be truly challenging and certainly has it’s share of obstacles.

From moving constantly, to unemployment, to lonely deployments, there are many moments that if we are being honest, have had some spouses say “what did I get myself into”! If this isn’t you…great! But, you’d be shocked at how often these conversations take place in our community.

While it’s appropriate to bring you the good times and be an eternal optimist—it helps to show the real side of things, and let others know they aren’t alone. We at Army Wife 101 have always been fans of bringing you the raw truth sprinkled with positivity.

We recently asked some Army Wife 101 readers over on FB “What’s the one thing you wish you had known before entering into the military lifestyle?”. Needless to say they didn’t hold back and we are glad they didn’t.

Here are: “13 “Real” Things Milspouse Wish They Knew Before Military Life Happened”.

  1. “That the most dangerous thing is to trust a spouse who is homebound with kids, bored, and unhappy. I wish I was warned about how many spouses will be mean just to do so.”
  2. “Your personal aspirations and your family will always, always come second. They tell you that, but I don’t think I ever realized exactly how much it was true.”
  3.  “I wish I had known this would be my lifestyle. It wasn’t when I got married, but now it is.”
  4.  “Spouses will ask their service member spouse permission to be friends with you…even though the spouses dont work in the same area…or branch.”
  5. “Things change last minute so never, and I do mean never, get your hopes us. Also, learn how to travel alone.”
  6. “Don’t get too comfortable. You will be made to adapt to their schedule whether you like it or not.”
  7. “How salty/jealous some spouses can be over another service members accomplishments and their success
  8. “The BIG difference in how NG vs AD Spouses are treated. I’ve been both so it was a hard transition.”
  9. “The military ultimately doesn’t really care for its service member’s or their families.”
  10. “You will make some “life long friendships “ and some are only for a “season”. “
  11. “You cannot rely on the military …….AT ALL!”
  12. “How often I have to defend myself to employers.”
  13. “How often my husband would be gone.”

What things do you wish you had known before you came into the military lifestyle?





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Krystel is the mom of two and an Army Wife. In addition to Army Wife 101 she is the Co-Founder of a digital media agency that connects brands with the military market. She has appeared on MSNBC ,FOX LA and formerly was a weekly contributor to HLN's "Raising America". She has written for various outlets including Sheknows and Lifetime and is a big fan of cupcakes and french fries.

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