Gearing up for a deployment can be overwhelming and very stressful because of all of the preparations that go into it. There are some very basic “absolutes” that need to be taken care of, so be sure not to put these things on the back burner in midst of everything.
Legal documents – If you and your spouse do not already have a Will and Power of Attorney (POA), then get one immediately. If you already have one, review it and update any needed changes. I know that sitting down and talking about last wishes can be emotional for many, but don’t let that stop you from getting this done. Also, be sure that your spouse updates his DD93/SGLI. This is important because you definitely want to be the person listed as the emergency contact and to also receive certain benefits (like death gratuity and life insurance). So if you are newly married or if your spouse was previously married, be sure to get this updated. Lastly, have a copy of your spouse’s orders.
Finances – Review your finances, know where the money is going and what your expenses normally are each month. Believe it or not, there is someone out there that does not know what their rent or mortgage payment is each month, or how much their insurance is, so don’t be that person. If your spouse normally handles these things, familiarize yourself with the finances, learn when bills are due, and sign up for auto pay (if that makes it easier for you). Also, be sure to get all passwords for online accounts so that you can log in and keep track of everything.
Passport – If you don’t have a passport, get one. You never know when an emergency might happen and you need to leave to the country to meet your spouse (for example, if they become sick or hurt and taken to Germany).
Be in the know – Learn the chain of command, get involved with the FRG (or at least introduce yourself to the FRG leader and FRSA) and double check to make sure your contact info is up to date. If no one has the correct contact information on file for you, then they cannot contact you with important information and updates. It is also important for you to have all of these individuals contact information in the event you need to reach out to them. Pick up one of the deployment handbooks if one has not been provided to you. It will include phone numbers and addresses/locations of key places on post that you might need.
Red Cross – Keep the Red Cross phone number posted in an easy to find spot in the event that you need to send an emergent message to your spouse. You can find the Red Cross phone number for your region by visiting their website.
Build your support network – A great support network can include your FRG, your church, your neighbors, family and friends. Even if your family and best friends are hours away, you can still talk and visit. It’s important to have someone you can talk with on a regular basis.
Keeping everyone updated – Many family members and friends will probably reach out to you wanting to know what to send in a care package, a mailing address, and for updates throughout the deployment. Be sure to have everyone’s information handy so that you can send out the updates, but please, do NOT put specific details publicly on Facebook or any social media site. Learn about operational security (OPSEC) if you need to know what is OK or not OK to post publicly.
Other – “Other” covers a multitude of things and each person will have different things to go in this category. “Other” includes what you need to do to personally make you feel more prepared embarking on this deployment. Some wives like to get a gun, buy pepper spray, have a security system installed, or make sure their car is in great working condition. Do whatever you need to do to feel more prepared and safe while your spouse is away.
Angelique is a proud Army wife and happily married to her husband, Ray. After being PCS’ed from one side of the country to the other, Ft. Bragg, NC, is currently home. She has a degree in Counseling and a career background in Corporate Human Resources. She is an advocate for animal rights and enjoys supporting military and environmental causes. She is an accomplished flute player of 23 years and in her spare time she enjoys crafting, decorating, genealogy, traveling, watching horrible B rated movies, and is obsessed with anything pertaining to Disney. She and Ray are the proud pet parents of two dogs, Maddie and Ringo.
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I don’t understand how Army wife deal with deployment, but to a certain extant I kind of do. Two of my brothers served in the Army and one in the National Guard. I hardly saw my brothers, they would be gone months years. The only thing that I have to say is that my brothers lives were a little different then most military officers.
My brothers did not have a wife or baby to worry about. As for myself I at one point time wanted to marry a military man. I went on a military dating site, but did not have any luck finding my dream military man.
I forgot about that site so I went on with my life and met other non military men. I was married to a non military man and it did not work out, so I took it upon my self to explore on the internet dating site. After searching for myself to meet someone decent lol I stumbled on this profile that caught my attention. I was surprised that this wonderful man that now I love very much and wanting to marry him.
“scouts honor” So we began to chat and he had told me that he was going to deployed, but I told him that it wouldn’t matter to me.
I kept in contact the whole time he was gone. I we were emailing each other the entire time he was there as I said.
I began to develop feeling for him and I do believe in a long distance relationships they are possible and difficult but I succeeded to hold on to him. I have been missing him since and the best part is that he is the love of my life.
I was sort of surprised that I would give my heart to any man. He managed to win my heart. I love him and no man could ever replace him. I don’t care if he is not a super rich, I still would not trade him in. For me love is worth more than any money or a lavish life. When I become an Army wife I know that we can make it a go. I am the type of women that is willing to compromise with what ever life will throw our way. Bottom line
I LOVE MY MILITARY MAN
Hi everyone, well as I was saying in my last comment, I am sure that it may difficult to have a husband deployed to another country and it can get lonely, hell I am not as of yet my sweethearts wife, but I really missed him a great deal since he got deployed.
To pass the time I emailed him everyday and hoped to get the chance to see him and In my emails I expressed how much loved him. I have not as of yet had the first kiss and my bear hug, but I am sure that I will sooner or later I prefer sooner. lol
I know that I will adapt to being an Army wife and sometimes being left home when duty calls. As I kept in contact all that time when duty called. learned alto about him, I could sense that he is very kind mature minded respectful and loving man.
I am very lucky to have met him online dating site. Most men on dating sites are not marriage material. I wanted to marry and settle down with a man from the military and that lived in the same city and god blessed me with the love of my life.
I have to say that god blessed me with a good man. I am proud of my sweetheart as much I am proud of my brothers for serving this for risking their lives to serve this country.
My oldest brother was awarded with many achievements during his service in the Army and I am very proud of him.
I am also proud of my other two brothers. My oldest brother was born in Vancouver Canada he made his citizen ship and enlisted the Army then following was my second brother he was born in Mexico he also became a citizen and enlisted in the Army as well.
My last but least youngest brother was born in the United States, he on the other hand enlisted in the National Guard. Nevertheless I am and will be proud my brothers.
I wanted to share with everyone that it is an honor to do something positive way. My brother and my future husband to be learned what is to be disciplined and take responsibility.
This isn’t only about my sweetheart and becoming an Army wife, it is also about being proud of men and women that serve this country and protect it.
It is really funny that people in general that have not served in the military take this country for granted and all that this country has to offer that other don’t.
I feel this way because I miss my oldest brother so much. Even thoe my brother died, I have kept my brothers awards that he earned while serving in the Army. Unless people have family in the service they would never understand how difficult it is to have a husband, brother or sister serving in the military there is a down side to being in the military, it is wondering if your love ones will come home safe.
“I Love You Edward”
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